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Keeping Romance Alive During Pregnancy

Author: Kandace Beck, CD(DONA), PCD(DONA), CIES, CEIM, Certified Sacred Pregnancy Instructor and Postpartum Mother Roaster of Butterfly Birth

Ok.. So your pregnant which means your sick, swelling, uncomfortable, moody, and I could go on and on. Being intimate with your significant other could be the last thing on your mind. Although some find pregnancy a time of extreme arousing (lucky women), most couples find this as a hard time to find their intimate space. This can be a particular challenge if you are not dealing with your 1st pregnancy. The more children that are already running around the less chance you have time for those more romantic moments with your significant other.

So lets talk about some ways you can keep your romance alive and be the light you are meant to while you carry a new life into the world.

WORK ON YOU FIRST - What I mean is find out if you need to release some bad energy or feelings. JOURNAL those feelings that are holding you back. It doesn't have to be a long entry every day, just whatever is bothering you or feelings you may need to express, WRITE THEM. Holding on to issues, hurts, fears can have a profound effect on you from day to day. You may not need to do anything other than to speak your mind, if you can't talk about it.. write about it. This can also be quite profound when the time comes to deliver your baby. Releasing feelings in pregnancy can give you an empowerment to birth your baby, and have nothing holding you or your body back to do the amazing job it is preparing for.

Also, take care of your physical needs. Taking time for yourself is very important while you are carrying a precious new life! Doing a daily meditation is the most peaceful thing you can do for yourself, not just while pregnant either. A meditation may look different for every person. If you are interested in finding out more about how to meditate check out our article. You may find that a great prenatal yoga class is just what you are needing, or you could find a Sacred Pregnancy Instructor in your area. The Pregnancy Journey Classes will go over most of what we are covering in this article.

The next thing we are going to talk about is HEART TO HEART CONNECTION:

This is a great exercise to practice with your partner. If you and your partner are going through a rough patch, and need to come back together this is perfect. Set the mood for the room, light some candles, put some fresh flowers in the room, put on your favorite music (a special song for you share together). This will immediately set the mood for the activity. Sit across from one another, in a comfortable position. You both should do a small personal meditation about what you are wanting to forgive the other for, or what you would like to send out into the universe for your partner. Once your meditation is over each of you should place your right hand over the others heart, and look each other in the eye. You can  practice this for as long as you like, you'll truly be amazed at the connection you feel to your partner. I highly suggest every couple does this activity at least once a week. It will help you stay connected!

NAKED TIME!! 
Being completely bare of inhibitions and raw with one another is extremely important! This is what the amazing Time Daulter has to say on this topic:

"Naked Time is where 2 people commit to stripping themselves bare (literally and figuratively) and to lay holding each for at least 15 minutes. This is not sex time (though if you want to follow up with connection in that way then more power to you!). this is opportunity for a couple to be physically close without anything between them. The feel of your beloved's skin, rhythm of their breath, and gentle beating of their heart - the many sensations that we have lost touch with in our busy lives, help to build connection. During Naked Time you have no choice but to be totally focused on each other. In our work we have found that many busy husbands who don't overly value "connecting" will be enthusiastic proponents of Naked Time. Then once together in the naked embrace, you cannot help but become more connected on many levels"

That about sums it up, being bare with the one you love is something that is SACRED, and should happen everyday!

FIND SOME TIME TO DATE.. Go out at least once a week with your partner. Dinner and a movie, walks on the beach, picnics in the park, yoga on Saturday mornings followed by a nice big breakfast, a day spent at the home in bed eating your favorite foods and reading together, or just a simple shared bath with essential oils are all great ideas on ways to spend time connecting and enjoying each other as you both walk this path. Ask your partner to give you a massage and end it with a love making session. Keep the dialogue open at all times, as this process should be a shared journey and not an isolated one.

A date night can really give you that memory of when your relationship first began, you get those tummy butterflies for each other and can connect to one another.





I hope that this has given you some incite on how to keep your romance alive! May you have a lifetime of love and happiness as your family grows. May your children see and implement the passion you shown them.. May they pass that on to their beloved as they are older!! LOVE & LIGHT TO YOU!

Sacred Salve.. A Healing Recipe

Kandace Beck, CD(DONA), CPES, CEIM - with Butterfly Birth, LLC

Healing is such an important part of your postpartum experience. This is a simple recipe of how to make a simple salve for all those baby needs and is great for mama too. We use this salve in our household often. Even now that my littles are growing.. we get lots of cuts and scraps with 2 boys around here. So.. this salve is great for those. Also.. I have found that it is great for a skin irritation such as a bug bite or small allergic reaction. It's even great for dry cracked skin or cuticles.

The healing powers of the herbs in this salve are safe and gentle, yet powerfully and effective. The healing powers of the herbs are transferred to the oils, and then beeswax is added to make a creamy balm. Beeswax naturally helps seal moisture into the skin, while still allowing it to 'breathe".

Supplies you'll need:
2 cups oil Sunflower
1/3 cup dried Comfrey
1/3 cup dried Chamomile
1/3 cup dried Calendula
6 capsules Vitamin E
2 ounces (approximately 2 tablespoons) beeswax

Directions:
Combine the herbs and oil in a heavy-bottomed saucepan. Place on the lowest possible heat - the oil should be warm, but not hot enough to "fry" the herbs! Let the oils and herbs infuse for at least three hours. Let the oil cool, then strain out and compost the herbs. Gently re-warm the oil, and add the beeswax. Cut or pierce the vitamin E capsules and squeeze the oil into the beeswax/oil mixture. Stir together until the beeswax is completely melted, and then remove from heat. Pour the salve into clean jars or tins.

If you find that you don't have enough time to make this amazing salve. You can purchase many products online, including my online shop at www.etsy.com/shop/organicbutterfly

What is a Tongue Tie and Why is it a Big Deal?

Nikki Imes, CD(DONA), Monitrice (OMA)

I am on a mission in my local birth and breastfeeding community: I am working to raise awareness about tongue-tie, its impact on breastfeeding, and the quality of life of the mothers and babies affected!

I come at this issue from a unique perspective. I am not a breastfeeding mom nor am I a Lactation Consultant. I am a birth doula, intern midwife and CranioSacral (CST) therapist. However, within the last year, I have been presented with a score of babies who have/had tongue-tie and have seen the negative impact this can have on new families.

As a birth professional, I was already vaguely “aware” of tongue-tie. However, once I began working on babies as a CranioSacral therapist, my awareness grew and things began to snowball. Now, I rarely go a week without either meeting a new tongue-tied client or working on a previously tied baby as part of continued CST care. 

So, what is tongue-tie?

“Ankyloglossia” or “tongue-tie” is defined in Dorland's Pocket Medical Dictionary as “abnormal shortness of the frenum of the tongue, interfering with its motion”. Sound simple, right? Sadly, not it isn't as simple as it sounds.

I am learning, as expressed in Alison Hazelbaker's book “Tongue-Tie; Morphogenesis, Impact, Assessment and Treatment”, there has long been a controversy amongst healthcare professionals about what tongue-tie is and if it has an impact on breastfeeding, speech, swallowing and other parts of everyday life for infants and adults. However, parents (and especially breastfeeding mothers) are much less conflicted about the negative effect of tongue-tie, even if they are not quite able to distinguish the various degrees of ties.

The classic anterior tie is the tongue-tie most healthcare professionals are familiar with. It is is characterized by the frenum (the “string” on the underside of the tongue) that is attached very far forward on the tongue, sometimes even to the tip. Signs that parents can to look for include a heart-shape to tip of tongue, a tongue that cannot extend over the lower lip and/or a tongue that truly looks “tied down” when baby cries. This can prevent babies from extending their tongue properly to achieve a good latch when breastfeeding and, in future, can lead to speech impediments (along with many other dental issues).

A posterior tongue-tie is quite a bit sneakier. The frenum is not visible in most cases, because the mucosa on the floor of the baby's mouth has enveloped it and causes an even tighter restriction of the tongue. Often, these babies are able to extend their tongue past their lower lip, but they are unable to lift their tongue very far upwards in their mouth. The tongue often makes a U shape when crying, instead of reaching towards palate. By being unable to press the breast tissue towards the roof of their mouth, they have extra difficulty transferring milk out of the breast.

Lip-tie, too...

To add insult to injury, often babies who have tongue-tie also have a lip-tie, as well. Dr. Kotlow of Albany, New York describes lip-ties as “continued attachment of the upper lip to the upper jaw tissue”. As a breastfeeding hurdle, lip-tie can prevent top lip flange, which also causes latch difficulties. Long-term, lip-ties (along with tongue-ties) can cause tooth decay, due to the lip never fully moving away from the base of the upper teeth and the tongue being unable to clear all food debris away from the teeth. Lip-ties also cause the “cute” gaping of teeth that is adorable in toddlers and a financial nightmare for parents with teens who require orthodontia.

Symptoms?

If you are looking inside your little one's mouth and are uncertain if they have a tie, the following symptoms may be helpful for you to determine if you are headed in the right direction:

l  Low milk supply (depending on the severity of the tie a baby may not be able to stimulate milk production through vigorous nursing or transfer the milk efficiently)

l  Creased/flat/blanched nipples after nursing

·      Painful nursing including cracked and bleeding nipples

·      Early weaning because child gets frustrated at the breast

·      Tooth Decay – Improper tongue mobility may prevent babies from clearing milk from their mouth, causing decay (especially on the top front teeth)

·      Colic, gassiness (inability to maintain suction at the breast means baby swallows a lot of extra air)

·      Slow weight gain (baby may actually be burning more calories than he is taking in, due to inefficient milk transfer)

·      Excessively long nursing sessions, with a baby that still acts hungry after leaving the breast (Occasional seasons where baby wants to nurse non-stop are often growth spurts and some babies just have a leisurely pace when nursing. However, tongue-tied babies often want to nurse non-stop because, as stated before, they burn more energy than they are taking in.)

·      Reflux

·      Sleep apnea

·      Abnormal sleep patterns (Waking often to feed because they are unable to fully drain the breast and therefore always hungry. )

·      Speech difficulties

·      Gap between teeth/jaw issues ( Tight tissues can prevent normal development in many areas of the mouth, not just the tongue.)

·      Thrush/mastitis due to inefficient milk transfer

·      Plugged ducts

So, what's a parent to do?

For an anterior tie, there are some pediatricians, midwives, ENTs, and dentists trained to clip them with  sterile scissors. It is a relatively minor procedure that can offer freedom from the restriction of the frenum tie.

For posterior ties and lip-ties, I highly recommend finding a healthcare professional trained to use a laser to release the mucosa under the tongue and the tissue holding down the lip. This is usually a dentist, believe it or not. They see the long-term effects of tongue-tie on the health of the mouth and can offer their patients relief from many symptoms by revising the ties. Laser revision is also very non-invasive and much preferred to what used to be the only option for posterior ties: scalpel incisions and sutures to restructure the tissue under the tongue.

Resources!

Here are some care providers trained in laser revision:

·        Lawrence Kotlow, DDS, PC – Albany, New York

·      Hugh Oser, DDS – Keller, Texas

·      Stacy Cole, DDS (Holistic Dentistry) – Fort Worth, Texas

·      Dr. James Jesse is a friend of Dr. Kotlow’s that has been recommended by several mamas. He is in San Bernadino, California.

·      Lindsey from Crunchy Savings went to Dr. Notestine  in Dayton Ohio

·      Dr. Martin Kaplan of Kid Care Dental in Stoughton, MA. was trained by Dr. Kotlow

(Credit goes to Heather at the Mommypotamus blog for compiling this list)

Other web resources include:

http://tonguetie.net/

The section on Dr. Kotlow's site with his articles, most of which are regarding tongue and lip-tie. Many of them also have great pictures of various types ties.

The Tongue-Tie Babies Support Group on Facebook, which is an international group of parents and professionals working to help support families through tongue and lip-tie revisions with all the questions and concerns they may have.

If you are local to the Oklahoma City metro area, I am always happy to help talk to parents about babies with suspected ties. You can find my contact info on my website.

 Also, one of the very first people who brought posterior tongue-tie to my attention, Margaret Back, is an IBCLC apart of the Lactation Services department at Integris Baptist in Oklahoma City. I highly recommend getting in touch with her for questions about whether posterior tongue-tie could be the culprit in certain breastfeeding situations.

My goal

My goal, as a birth professional supporting new families,  is to empower parents, lactation consultants, doulas, pediatricians, breastfeeding educators, La Leche League leaders, midwives, doctors and the public at large with the information regarding tongue-tie. Many families are suffering needlessly and in an age of instant access to info, this doesn't need to be the case! 

Sacred Name - Naming Your Baby

By: Kandace Beck, CD(DONA), CPES, CEIM with Butterfly Birth, LLC

"What's in a name? That which we call a rose.. By any other name would smell as sweet" Shakespeare's Romeo & Juliet

As your pregnancy moves farther along, you may start to ask the question “What should I name my baby”. Choosing a name for a precious name family member can make the whole experience seem very real. Sometimes we struggle with naming our babies, because let’s face it, it’s another person identity. You may find clarity by asking yourself what is holding you back. As the amazing poet Rumi once said “Our children are not ours, but they come through us. We do not own them, we guide them”. Choosing your new babies name is the first step in guiding them into this world.

“Naming your baby is personal, it’s political, it’s spiritual, it’s artistic, it’s identifying” Anni Daulter

Finding a new name for your little one should be a celebrated experience during your pregnancy. Something you may also want to explore is the relationship you have you’re your own name. Find out how and why your parents gave you the chosen name you have, are you comfortable with that, and what would you change about it? These are all things that can help you find the perfect name your baby was meant to have. Sometimes you may want to wait until your baby is earthside to name your baby. Many cultures name their children in this way. If you have older children, you may want to get them involved in the naming of their new sibling. In many cultures older siblings care for the younger siblings as if they were parents. Your babies name is what he/she will hear more than any other word in their lifetime, it’s the essence of who they are and what they are to become. A person’s name carries with it the energy of that person and as such should be given with care. You may also want to hold a naming ceremony.

A naming ceremony is a non-religious celebration of the arrival of a new child. It is a way of welcoming the child and officially introducing him/her to family and friends. Naming ceremonies are appropriate for anyone, at any age. The arrival of a new baby, uniting of step or adopted children within a family, or an adult name change are all great reasons to hold a naming ceremony.

Naming ceremonies involve the important people in the child's life - family and special friends. Parents have the opportunity to ask other adults to play a supportive role to their child through to adult life (grandparents, godparents, mentors or supporters). Poems, readings and quotes of personal significance can be used throughout the ceremony. Often a symbolic gesture is also made such as the lighting of a candle, planting of a tree etc. In addition, certificates are presented to parents and other special people as a record of the occasion. Naming ceremonies are not a baptism or christening. While the ceremonies are non-religious, many parents with religious beliefs hold naming ceremonies to welcome their child. Doing so does not prevent the child from holding or participating in a religious ceremony at any stage of their life. While the Naming Ceremony and accompanying documents don't have any legal status, they are a wonderful way to welcome your child and celebrate them as they begin their journey through life. Each ceremony is unique and is tailored to suit your individual needs.

A basic checklist of things to consider follows:

• Choose date and time for the ceremony 
• Decide on venue 
• Confirm celebrant 
• Meet with celebrant to ensure you feel comfortable 
• Pay deposit to celebrant 
• Collate guest list 
• Decide on invitations (optional) · 
• Send invitations (four weeks prior is a good guide) 
• Select ceremony style and format 
• Choose 'special people' to participate in the ceremony 
• Choose symbolic gesture for ceremony (optional) 
• Choose the music (optional) 
• Choose poems, readings or quotes (optional) 
• Write any special words, poems etc (optional) 
• Choose a theme (optional) 
• Choose decorations (optional) 
• Decide what child will be wearing 
• Decide on food and drink requirements 
• Follow up guests who haven't sent an RSVP (one week prior) 
• Ask for volunteers to help on the day 
• Book a photographer or nominate a friend to take photos 

Here are some ideas to help you plan your special day: 

• Time capsule/treasure box - Can contain small gifts, photos, letters or written note cards. The capsule/box is presented to the child when they turn 18 or 21. Invite guests to bring an item instead of a present i.e. CDs; magazines; newspapers; the Guinness Book of Records; coin collections; symbols of something they wish for the child such as runes & crystals to symbolize different things like peace and hope; pebbles from someone's favorite beach 'that the child may always have a special place to go and think'; Celtic symbols such as a horseshoe for good luck; cuff links that he may be a gentleman; a joke book - that she/he may always keep her/his sense of humor; a pressed leaf that they may appreciate nature. 
• Photo board of baby photos of 'special people'. 
• Personalized stamps with a photo of your child - for sending out the invitations or thank you notes. 
• Planting of a tree - Guests help plant the tree and as they place dirt into the ground, they say a word/s expressing their wish for the child OR give out bells for guests to ring as the tree is planted (Native Australian Plants are ideal and symbolic). 
• Lighting of a candle - Candles can be personalized and decorated with little flowers, butterflies, sporting items, cars, child's name, photo, date of birth, weight and length and a poem etc. The parents light the candles, make wishes for their child and promise that on each birthday when they light the candle on the cake they will remember what a miracle the child is. 
• Historical significance - mentioning important things that happened in history on the child's day of birth. 
• Video record - get all your guests to say something about the child (wishes etc) to play back at their 18th/21st. 
• Release a dove - the worldwide symbol for peace. 
• Wishing well/cards - Guests write their wish for the child on a note and place it in a wishing well for the parents to read and keep for the child. 
• Rose petal blessing - Shower with rose petals. 
• Fairy Dust - used at the blessing instead of roses/water. Special people say nice words/wishes as they sprinkle it (Fine glitter, nontoxic - warning it sticks to absolutely everything!). 
• Soaring spirit celebration - Releasing of balloons to encourage your child's spirit to bloom and grow. 
• Write a poem about your child to read at the ceremony. 
• Meaning of name commemorative certificate - a detailed full color, laminated certificate. The child's name is displayed at the top of the certificate, along with the names origin and meaning. The rest of the certificate could include details such as Emotional Spectrum; Personal Integrity; Personality; Relationships; Travel & Leisure; Career and Money; Life's opportunities; their lucky numbers, star sign and birth date. 
• Ceremony theme - base the ceremony around the meaning of your child's name. 
• Star sign commemorative certificate - a full color, laminated certificate providing information about the child's star sign. 
• Astrological chart about your child's life - various charts are available depending on the level of detail you want. 
• Signature bear - For guests to sign creating a permanent memento of the day and guests who attended. 
• Photo signature frame - Frame a photo of your child with a large enough border for people to write on it. It becomes a beautiful reminder of the day and something you can hang in their room or the house. 
• Thank you/Memento cards for guests - Cards mailed out within a couple of weeks of the ceremony are a lovely way to thank your guests for being part of your child's special day. You could hand-make the thank you card and include a photo of your child or consider ordering personalized cards. The options are limitless.

Naming Story

When we got pregnant with our 1^st son I really struggled with what to name him. I knew I wanted it to be unique and something he would not be hesitant to love as much as we did. I knew that this is the 1^st thing I would be giving to him as a parent.

I began doing lots of family research to come up with the “perfect” name for him. My husband is Irish, and we both decided that we wanted him to have a good, strong, Irish names. I also began to ask my mother why my brother had 4 names. She told me all of the men on her side of the family have 4 names, and I knew that was a tradition that I wanted to carry on. My husband also wanted our 1^st sons name to begin with an R, as that was a family tradition.

So.. We started going through “name books” like most parents do. I just didn’t find anything that I fell in love with or that fit our needs above. So.. I just quit looking for a while, and meditated about it, and just let things fall into place. My mother called me one day and said she dreamed of the name “Ryker”, I asked her where she found it, and she couldn't tell me, she said it just came to her. I fell in love with the name right away, but wanted to make sure it was Irish and what it’s meaning was.

I took the name and started doing some research. Turns out the name “Ryker” is Irish Celtic for “Robert”, which incidentally is my father in laws name. So then I started thinking of the other 2 names. My husband’s name is Ryan Lee and I knew I wanted that to be incorporated. So I just decided to change the order a bit. My 1^st son was born with the name “Ryker Lee Ryan Beck”. I am proud to be his mother, and am proud to have given him a name that can carry him through life, with pride and understanding.

What will you name your baby, or have named your baby? Leave a comment below about your babies name, and story!

Slow Parenting: The 4th Trimester

Author & Photography: Deanna Norris

You've spent the last nine (10) months nourishing, nurturing, connecting with the little being that grew inside of your womb. Society would suggest that now that baby is here, anyone can step into these sacred parental roles, freeing you up to “get back into the game”. You find yourself wanting to crawl into bed with your little one and watch them coo and gurgle away the days. Despite the demands that modern society puts on us, that is exactly what you should do.

But I’ve got a different perspective for new parents to consider. The “Fourth Trimester” is a term used by is a term used by Dr. Harvey Karp to describe the first few months of an infants’ life. He says that infants are born “too soon” based on their underdevelopment when compared to other mammal babies. If human babies were born when they were developmentally ready, we would have yearlong pregnancies and 3-month old sized newborns. American babies tend to cry more, have more digestive issues and generally are unhappier than other babies around the globe.

America is the only industrialized country in the world that does not have mandatory paid maternity leave for new parents. This means mothers going back to work 1, 2, 4 weeks after they’ve just given birth. This is equally traumatizing to the mother and the baby. Consequently, we also have the highest rate of infant and maternal death, “colic”, and GERD. Karp theorizes that colic and GERD do not exist in other countries because of the “lying in” period that other cultures encourage mothers to fulfill after birth. For 40 days, moms are waited on, cooked for, taken care of, while bonding with their new babies. This, coupled with 12-50 weeks of paid maternity leave, makes a huge impact in those first few moments of a newborns’ life.

One could theorize that because other parents are getting that crucial alone time with their infants to bond, carry and meet their basic needs themselves, American babies are responding with a loud wail of disapproval. Exploring the theory that our newborns are underdeveloped and our new mothers are physically and emotionally overwhelmed, the following are some gentle ways to promote self-care and infant bonding, even if you cannot fully have a “fourth trimester” period.

*Baby wearing

*Swaddling

*Breastfeeding

Have a “baby moon”. Take your infant to bed and spend several days or weeks simply bonding, nourishing and nurturing your child. Get to know their cues and allow your body to rest and heal in the process.

*Nourishing soups

*Foods high in iron

*Lots of water

Nourishing herbal infusions are a great way to replenish your body with vital minerals and nutrients.

Use equal parts (1 oz) of the following:

Red Raspberry Leaf

Nettle

Chamomile

Catnip

Blessed Thistle

Comfrey.

Mix all herbs into a bowl with airtight lid, or Mason jar. Using about a Tablespoon of the mix, put herbs in a reusable tea bag or infuser. Pour just boiled water over the herbs and allow herbs to steep for a minimum of 10 minutes. Overnight is even better! Sweeten with local, raw honey and enjoy. Drink daily.

*Meditate

*Belly Binding

*Mayan Abdominal Massage

Herbal baths are a great way to relax and bond with baby, while healing your delicate areas. Demetria Clark shares these recipes with us in Issue 44 of Midwifery Today.

2 parts plantain flower (Plantago major)

1 part calendula flower (Calendula officinalis)

1 part comfrey leaf (Symphytum officinale)

1 part burdock (Arctium lappa)

1/2 part violet flower and leaf (Viola odorata)

1 part yarrow flower (Achillea millefolium)

1/2 part lady's mantle flower and leaf (Alchemilla vulgaris)

1/2 part lemon balm leaf (Melissa officinalis)

Mix well. You can add sea salt to the mixture if you wish. Add approximately one cup of herb and salt blend to six quarts boiling water, strain and add to shallow bath. You can also use as a compress.

1 cup sea salt

1/2 cup plantain leaf (Plantago major)

1/2 cup calendula flower (Calendula officinalis)

Use six cups of water.

Alternative ways to use herbal baths:

Brew with the above ratios and add to a Peri Bottle for use after going to the bathroom.

Pour some pre-brewed herbal mix on to pads and freeze for a pain relieving ice pack.

Use a diluted mix around baby’s cord for healing.

*Ask for help

*Take photos of these first sacred days

*Journal your birth experience

Taking this time to your family is self-care that we should expect and encourage of every new mom, always. 

Meditation: Reduce Your Stress and Stay Rested

Author: Kandace Beck, CD(DONA), CPES, CEIM

Photos provided by: http://www.yoganonymous.com/back-to-school-seven-ways-to-meditate-celebrate-life-as-a-family/ 

Being a parent, becoming a new parent, entering a new relationship, starting a new career and all of the life situations can all carry a lot of stress which has you anxious, tense and worried, consider trying meditation. Spending even a few minutes in meditation can restore your calm and inner peace. Anyone can practice meditation. It's simple and inexpensive, and it doesn't requite any special equipment. An you can practice meditation wherever you are -- whether you're our for a walk, riding the bus, waiting at the doctor's office or even in the middle of a difficult business meeting.

Meditation has been around in recorded history for thousands of years. The history of Meditation dates all the way back to ancient times. There has been proof found in Indian artifacts of the history of meditation called, “Tantra,” that speaks of such practices, dating back 5000 years. Researchers suggest that primitive hunting and gathering societies may have been the ones to have discovered meditation and its many different states of consciousness while gazing into the flames of their fires. The history of Meditation has evolved over thousands of years, into a structured practice that people use daily. One of the biggest proponents in the history of meditation is the Buddha. The Buddha is also known as one of the biggest meditation icons in both current and times past and has been around since 500 B.C..  The teaching of the Buddha became popular in the Asian continent. According to the history of meditation other separate countries and cultures soon adopted many different forms of meditation creating their own special ways of practicing it. Some of the most popularly used forms today are the Buddhist and Hindu-based Easter-style meditation.

Meditation offers innumerable benefits for your body, mind and spirit. The rest you gain in meditation is deeper than the deepest sleep. The deeper your rest, the more dynamic your activity is.Meditation has two important benefits:

• Meditation prevents stress from getting in the system
• Mediation releases accumulated stress that is in the system

Both of these happen simultaneously, leaving one refreshed and joyful. Why meditation, the physiology undergoes a change and every cell in the body is filled with more prana (energy). This results in joy, peace, enthusiasm as the level of prana is the body increases.
On a physical level meditation:

• Lowers high blood pressure
• Lowers the level s of blood lactate, reducing anxiety attacks
• Decreases any tension-related pain, such as, tension headaches, ulcers, insomnia, muscle and joint problems.
• Increases serotonin production that improves mood and behavior
• Improves the immune system
• Increases the energy level, as you gain an inner source of energy

Meditation brings the brainwave pattern into an Alpha state that promotes healing. The mind becomes fresh, delicate and beautiful. With regular practice of meditation:

• Anxiety decreases
• Emotional stability improves
• Creativity increases
• Happiness increases
• Intuition develops
• Gain clarity and peace of mind
• Problems become smaller
• Meditation sharpens the mind by gaining focus and expands through relaxation
• A sharp mind without expansion causes tension, anger and frustration
• An expanded consciousness without sharpness can lead to lack of action/progress
• The balance of a sharp mind and an expanded consciousness brings perfection

Meditation make you aware - that your inner attitude determines your happiness:
Emotional steadiness and harmony. It cleanses and nourishes you from within an calms you, whenever you feel overwhelmed, unstable, or emotionally shut down.
Meditation brings harmony in creation. When you meditate, you are in the space of vastness, calmness and joy and this is what you emit into the environment, bringing harmony to the Creation/Planet.
Consciousness evolves. With the assimilation of meditation into daily life, your consciousness evolves and in time, is able to experience the higher and refined states of consciousnesses. When your consciousness evolves and expands, that disturbances in your life become negligible. Anger and disappointments become fleeting emotions that occur momentarily and then vanish. You start living in 'the moment' and let go of 'the past'.
Personal Transformation. Meditation can bring about a true personal transformation. As you learn more about yourself, you'll naturally want to discover more about the mystery of life, the universe, etc. Then the questions that arise in the mind are - What is the meaning of life? What is its purpose? What is this world, what is love, what is knowledge..? Once these questions arise, know hat you're very fortunate. These questions need to be understood; you cannot find the answers in books. As you live through answering them you'll witness that life transformation to a richer level.

Cosmic Consciousness dawns in you. With the assimilation of meditation into daily life, the fifth state of consciousness, called cosmic consciousness, dawns. Cosmic consciousness - is to perceive the whole cosmos as part of oneself. When you perceive the world as part of yourself, love flows strongly between the world and you. This love empowers you to bear the opposing forces and the disturbances in your life. Anger and disappointments become fleeting emotions that occur momentarily and then vanish. You start living in 'the moment' and let go of 'the past'. The confluence of knowledge, understanding and practice makes life complete. When you grow into higher states of consciousness, you become beautiful yet strong - a soft, delicate and beautiful blossom capable of accommodating different values in life without any conditions.

Meditation is an umbrella term for the many ways to a relaxed state of being. There are many types of meditation and relaxation techniques that have meditation components. All share the same goal of achieving inner peace. Ways to mediate can include:

Guided meditation. Sometimes called guided imagery or visualization, with this method of meditation you form mental images of places or situations you find relaxing. You try to use as many senses as possible, such as smells, sights, sounds and textures. you may be led through this process by a guide or teacher. 

Mantra mediation. In this type of meditation, you silently repeat a calming word, thought or phrase to prevent distracting thoughts.

Mindfulness meditation. This type of meditation is based on being mindful, or having an increased awareness and acceptance of living in the present moment. You broaden your conscious awareness. you focus on what you experience during meditation, such as flow of your breath. You can observe your thoughts and emotions but let them pass without judgment. 

Qi Gong. This practice generally combines meditation, relaxation, physical movement and breathing exercises to restore an maintain balance. Qi gong (CHEE-gung) is part of traditional Chinese medicine.

Tai Chi. This is a for of gentle Chinese martial arts. In Tai Chi (TIE-chee), you perform a self-paced series of postures or movements in a slow, graceful manner while practicing deep breathing.

Transcendental meditation. You use a mantra, such as a word, sound or phrase repeatedly silently, to narrow your conscious awareness and eliminate all thoughts form your mind. You focus exclusively on your mantra to achieve a state of perfect stillness and consciousness.

Yoga. You perform a series of postures and controlled breathing exercises to promote a more flexible body and a calm mind. As you move through poses that require balance and concentration, you're encouraged to focus less on your busy day and more on the moment. 

Don't let the thought of meditating the "right" way add to your stress. Sure, you can attend special meditation centers or group classes led by trained instructors. But you also can practice meditation easily on your own. An you can make meditation as formal or informal as you like - whatever suits your lifestyle and situation. Some people build meditation into their daily routine. For example, they may start and each day with an hour of meditation. But all you really need is a few minutes of quality time for meditation. Here are some ways you can practice meditation on your own, whenever you choose:

Breathe deeply. This technique is good for beginners because breathing is a natural function. Focus all attention on your breathing. Concentrate on feeling and listening as you inhale and exhale through your nostrils. Breathe deeply and slowly. When your attention wanders, gently return your focus to your breathing.

Scan your body. When using this technique, focus attention on different parts of your body. Become aware of your body's various sensations, whether that's pain, tension, warmth or relaxations. Combine body scanning with breathing exercises and imagine breathing heat or relaxation into and our of different parts of your body.

Repeat a mantra. You can create your own mantra, whether it's religious or secular. Examples of religious mantras include the Jesus Prayer in the Christian tradition, the holy name of God in Judaism, or the om mantra of Hinduism, Buddhism and other Eastern religions.

Walk and meditate. Combining a walk with meditation is an efficient and healthy way to relax. You can use this technique anywhere you're walking - in a tranquil forest, on a city sidewalk or at the mall. When you use this method, slow down the pace of walking so that you can focus on each movement of your legs or feet. Don't focus on a particular destination. Concentrate on your legs and feet, repeating action words in your mind such as lifting, moving and placing as you lift each foot, move your leg forward and place your foot on the ground. 

Engage in prayer. Prayer is the best known and most widely practiced example of meditation. Spoken and written prayers are found in most faith traditions. you can pray using your own words or read prayers written by others. Check the self-help or 12-step-recovery section of your local bookstore for examples. Talk with your rabbi, priest, pastor or other spiritual leader about resources.

Read and reflect. Many people report that they benefit from reading poems or sacred texts, and taking a few moments to quietly reflect on their meaning. You also can listen to sacred music, spoken works or any music you find relaxing or inspiring. You may want to write your reflections in a journal or discuss them with a friend or spiritual leader. 

Focus your love and gratitude. In this type of meditation, you focus your attention on a sacred object or being, weaving feelings of love and gratitude into your thoughts. You can also close your eyes and use your imagination or gaze at representations of the object. 

Don't judge your mediation skills, which may only increase your stress. Meditation takes practice. Keep in mind, for instance, that it's common for your mind to wander during meditation, no matter how long you've been practicing. If you're mediating to calm your mind and your attention wanders, slowly return to the object, sensation or movement you're focusing on.Experiment, and you'll likely find out what types of meditation work best for your an what you enjoy doing. Adapt meditation to your needs at the moment. Remember, there's no right or wrong way to meditate. What matters is that meditation helps you with stress reduction and feeling better overall.

Slow Parenting :: Your 1 year old

Author: Deanna Norris of Earthbound Soul Birth Services

Photo provided by Ian Norris of Ian Norris Photography

One of the happiest days of your life was when you looked into your newborn child’s eyes. Squishy face, wrinkly forehead and covered in the vernix that protected him while growing inside your body. You've spent many countless hours tending to the needs of this new life. Holding when holding was needed, rocking when rocking was needed, feeding when feeding was needed.

Although you have no textbook to guide you while wandering down this winding path of parenthood, you brave the peaks and valleys with gusto. You savor the moments of triumph and you learn from the unfortunate moments of regret. As your child grows and changes physically and developmentally, you also grow and change in the way you parent. Upon arriving at your child’s first birthday, you almost feel like you know what you’re doing in this crazy parenting game.

In this great circle of parenthood, there are always going to be questions. The ones we ask ourselves in the night while patiently rocking a baby back to sleep and the ones asked of others, sometimes with an expectant tone or air of judgment. We can often silence the self-questioning by looking intently at the life we are leading. We feel good about the answer. We are confident in our ways and continue to glide seamlessly into that direction. Then there are the other times, the ones when another’s voice asks the questions. You get this feeling deep inside your belly and it washes over you like morning fog with doubt leading the way like Helios on his chariot.

Our culture is one of achievement. This voraciously applies to children. Society says that our children should have accomplished any number of things by the time they are approaching their first birthday.

“Your child should be standing alone, and may even have taken those first tentative solo steps…”

“Your child should be sleeping less during the day and more at night…”

“You can make the transition from breast milk or formula to cow’s milk…”

Listening to so-called experts instead of our own paternal intuition most often causes undue stress and uncertainty. At every stage of your child’s life, there will be some grand preset guideline that you can look to for insight on when milestones should be reached. Weighing our child’s milestone against this chart is done out of curiosity; fear of “abnormal” development and frankly, because it’s widely available to us.

The checklist for a 1 year old can be overwhelming, and to some, feel like a countdown to making their child do things you as the parent do not feel they are ready for. How daunting it must feel as a parent to look at your beautiful child and think there could be something developmentally wrong with them because they aren't pinching cheerios by their first birthday.

You begin to wonder if something is developmentally wrong with your child if they aren't hitting these check points that Google tells you are normal. Maybe you aren't doing everything you should be as a parent to help your child hit those milestones? You turn to the Internet for advice. And the uncertainty spiral begins. 

Stepping fully into parenthood relies on intuition, natural evolution and willingness to make a mistake from time to time. As parents, it is our duty to react to our children in a way that is gracious and respectful. Gently listening for and to their needs and offering to them what we believe in our hearts to be the answer. Watch your little one for clues on how this offering is received. Did it fulfill their need or was it something else they required? Make adjustments when necessary.

The truth is, parenting a child who has been on this earth 12 months is no different from parenting a child who has been here for 12 days. They look to you for comfort, security, nourishment and enjoyment. While it will look different at 12 months than at 12 days, it really is important to let the process evolve organically. With every shift in routine, there will be positives and negatives both for you and your child. Holding space for this to be okay is essential. Trust your intuition and be gentle with yourself when you don’t get it quite right.

“Earlier is not better. All children accomplish milestones in their own way, in their own time.” Magda Gerber

Sacred Recipe: Postpartum Sitz Bath

Recipe By: Kandace Beck

Creator at Organic Butterfly

A sitz bath is a special bath used in the early postpartum period to help ease pain, promote healing and give good hygiene to the perennial area. This is particularly helpful after an episiotomy or tearing during birth. Though it also helps ease swelling in the perineum or a swollen labia.

In the hospital you may be given a portable sitz bath. This sits over a normal sized toilet. You fill a bag with warm water and sit on the sitz bath. The warm water then flows over your perineum allowing for healing and cleansing. You can add medication or herbal preparations at will.

You will need a combination of at least three of any of the following herbs:

½ cup of each

·         Comfrey (cell proliferant, vulnerary)

·         Rosemary (antiscptic)

·         Lavender (anti-microbial)

·         Myrrh

·         Calendula (anti-microbial, anti-inflammatory)

·         Sheppards Purse (hemostatic)

·         Epsom Salt

Add 2 cloves of garlic to each bath (optional)

In a large pot, bring 2 quarts of water to a boil, remove from heat. Place the herbs, salt, and garlic into a cheesecloth sack (can be added loose or in a tea steeping ball too). Add to the water, cover and let steep for 3-4 hours. The “tea” can be stored in the refrigerator for up to 3 days. Use 2 cups of tea to each stiz bath you do.

Fill the tub with hot water, but just high enough to cover your perennial area when sitting, not to full or it will be diluted too much. Add the “tea” and soak for 20-30 minutes once or twice a day. You may also add a few drops of tea tree oil or a squirt of pure aloe vera to the bath for extra comfort.

Enjoy your postpartum bath 2-3 times per day for optimal results. Take care of yourself mamas, it's important!

This product can also be purchased at Organic Butterfly.